Pete's Log: Oh SharePoint
Entry #2321, (SharePoint, Work)(posted when I was 44 years old.)
Today was another one of those fun SharePoint administration days where I spent too long trying to read logs and understand why something was failing, where instead I should have just ignored the logs and simply recreated the failing service:
Remove-SPDistributedCacheServiceInstance Add-SPDistributedCacheServiceInstance
After those two lines of PowerShell, everything was back to normal. Sigh.